


Redemption is Complex or Maybe It's Just Ben

by TuckerPuppy (HarleyD)



Category: Lost
Genre: (kind of), .... there is a pattern here, Awkward Ben, Ben Whump, Ben and Hurley friendship, Difficult Ben, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Emotionally stunted Ben, Gen, Post-Series, Redemption
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-08-27
Updated: 2016-08-27
Packaged: 2018-08-11 07:39:34
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,882
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/7882489
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HarleyD/pseuds/TuckerPuppy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Ben agreed to help Hugo, but it's not working out quite like that. Hugo is dead set on helping Ben find his redemption. Oneshot post Hugo taking over.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Redemption is Complex or Maybe It's Just Ben

**Author's Note:**

> Author's Note: Just a little one shot that wouldn't leave me alone, I wish we could have seen more of Hugo and Ben on the island after Hugo took over. And if you think my Ben is too meek just check out the post Island snippet... my poor Ben acts like a beat down pet dog.

Hugo was trying to pull himself together, and he finally centered on Ben kneeling on the ground in front of him, on Ben trying to encourage him. He stared at him and realized now at least one thing that being the protector of the island gave him. He couldn't read Ben's thoughts but he could _see_ what Ben was feeling.

The other man was smiling, trying to help, but all Hugo could see was fear. Ben was afraid of failing, was afraid of losing the island, was afraid of what he would do if he was forced to leave, was afraid that he would be forgotten and abandoned. Again. There were other feelings there, Ben had a lot of ambition, a lot of drive. He could see what Jacob saw, and he thought Jacob had interpreted it all wrong.

Sure, Ben had his down sides. He could be jealous, selfish, and he could be careless about who he hurt, and because he did all these things for power, Jacob had written him off. Hugo could see something else though, yes, he wanted power but it was because he needed to be needed. Jacob hadn't trusted him and had refused to meet him directly, had refused to directly bring him into the loop, and that had only made Ben go to higher extremes to try to hold on to his power. He feared if he lost it, he would lose everything. And he had.

Hugo tilted his head, "Will you help me?"

"I'm sorry?" He had thought that would appeal to the other man, but there was just more fear. More fear that he would be used for some greater purpose, that he would spend the rest of his life acting as someone else's pawn. None of it showed on his face though, he just looked at Hugo with that blank look on his face, he was obviously quite surprised though, that rang out clearly, but the fear was keeping anything else from showing.

"I could really use someone with like…experience. For a little while. Will you help me Ben?"

Ben's eyes widened and Hugo realized until that point the other hadn't believed that he was really asking. He looked… touched, that was the only word Hugo could think of. He finally managed to get out, "I'd be honored."

"Cool."

Ben smiled in return, though it was weighted, he wasn't sure what it would mean for him, that much Hugo could tell.

* * *

"Sit down Ben."

Ben eyed him warily, but sat down, eyes on the ground. Hurley pursed his lips, he didn't like seeing Ben so whipped, and what he was about to do wasn't going to help. "Yes?"

"I want you to…" He paused and pushed forward, "I want you to make a list of everything you've ever done wrong Ben." Ben's head snapped up, shock on his face and Hurley pushed on, "And I mean everything Ben."

Ben's face was coloring, and he was scared "Why?"

Hurley felt awful as Ben's voice wobbled, and he met his eyes, "Because we need to talk about each thing so you stop carrying it around Ben, you understand?"

His eyes were wide, scared and he whimpered out, "You'll make me leave."

"We have been over this Ben, I won't." He didn't tell Ben that he already knew everything he had ever done, could already see it. He had a lot of skeletons, but there was nothing that Hurley wouldn't forgive him for, and Ben needed to be relieved of that guilt.

Ben was looking at him like a whipped dog, angry and upset but too scared of being banished to say anything. He tilted his head, "One week to make it Ben."

That startled him as well and he made a vague motion with his hand, "There are things that I've been taking care of that need my-"

"Not for the next week they don't."

He looked like he wanted to say something and Hurley tried to get a feel for him but Ben was so hard to read because fear nearly overran everything else, all the time. "Of… of course."

He didn't want to push him so he nodded and left, leaving Ben sitting hunched in the chair, staring hard at the table.

* * *

While most ate dinner in their houses, lunch everyone generally gathered in the cafeteria. Hurley watched Ben get his food, shaking his head as he approached a table, but quickly retreated when the folks sitting there glared him down. It was a daily occurrence. He was sure Ben would rather just sit by himself but Hurley had specifically told him to attempt to sit with the others, every single day. It had been nearly a month though, and they still refused to warm up to him, and he was starting to think he was doing some damage to him making him keep trying.

He watched Ben sit at a table by himself and sighed, getting food and moving to join him. Ben looked relieved when he sat next to him, mouth twitching up in that half smile. "Hello Hugo." He glanced at the table, and back down, sounding defeated, "How long are you going to make me keep trying to make friends?"

Hurley took a bite of a sandwich instead of answering, and could nearly feel the frustration rolling off of Ben. He took his time answering. "They will warm up Ben."

"They hate me."

He didn't answer him and eventually Ben gave up waiting and went back to eating his lunch. It was cruel, but it was the way to deal with Ben. He hadn't understood that at first, you couldn't lead Ben, and to keep Ben in line you had to make sure he didn't hold any power in a conversation. Hurley could see the good in him, and was starting to really like him, but the other still had some issues, and Hurley was doing his best to help him work through it.

With his recent order of making a list Ben seemed particularly down though, pushing at his food and Hurley frowned. He stood up, picking up his tray, Ben startled. "Come on Ben."

He was frozen though, eyes darting to the other table, "Come where?"

Hurley smiled, "Don't play stupid. We're gonna go sit at the other table." He paused, "If that is okay with you?" Ben didn't say anything else and though he looked unhappy he stood up, holding his tray. Hurley started heading towards the other table, Ben following faithfully and he tilted his head at him, "You know I'm not going to send you away if you disagree with me."

He nodded to himself, gave Hurley that submissive smile that Hurley was really starting to hate and looked back to the floor. "Of course."

There weren't two seats together, and though they were happy to see Hurley, Ben awkwardly stood to the side until Hurley pointed at the empty chair across from him and a few seats down, "Sit down Ben."

He did, though they gave him very little room and he set his tray down, pressing his hands in his lap. He stared at his tray, even after the awkward moment passed and everyone started talking again. He was sure Hurley was giving him a disapproving look, but every muscle in his body was tensed, and it was all he could do to stay there.

He didn't touch his food, never moved his hands from his lap, scrambling to his feet when he saw Hurley stand up. He was so intent on getting out of there that he didn't even see the looks on the others faces, but Hurley did. He smiled as he followed Ben out, he had seen the sympathy on their faces, maybe even guilt at their behavior. Benjamin Linus was not the same person he had been, and it was high time they realized and forgave him.

Outside the building Ben turned on him, looking more distressed that Hurley had ever seen him. His voice was high pitched, angry, "Please do not make me do that again." Still submissive though, still that pleading in his words that made Hugo frown.

"It will get better Ben."

He look enraged, "Fine. Guess I'll just go make my _list_ then." He turned and left in a huff, stomping towards his house. Hurley was worried about it, he had never seen the other so upset and he was starting to doubt his decision.

* * *

Hurley was sitting at his desk the next day when an angry Ben stomped in and slammed something down on his desk. He raised his eyes and picked up the piece of paper to look at. He felt his eyebrows go up as he read down the list but frowned. "This isn't everything."

"It is."

He met Ben's eyes, made sure he could see how serious he was, "I need you to take this seriously Ben, take some time and make a complete list, this whole purpose of this is to get everything out in the open, its pointless if you won't do it right."

He stared at him, incensed, "I'm not a child."

He sighed and pushed the paper towards him, "I don't think you are. You will do this though, and you will do it right."

"That's everything."

"It isn't and you know it."

His voice was cold, "That is all you are going to get."

Hurley stood up abruptly, he was disappointed and finally getting angry himself. He was only trying to help the other. "I'm not kidding Ben."

"Neither am I."

They were locked in a stare for long enough that it was getting awkward and finally Ben angrily looked away, refusing to budge though. Hurley shook his head, "I'm gonna transfer you off island, Ben. To one of the dharma stations inland."

He brushed past him, carelessly. If he couldn't make life better for Ben here, he would release him and let him find it on his own. He ignored the shocked look on his face, and headed out of the office.

Ben was at his heels, nervous now, "You said you wouldn't send me away."

"Because of anything you did in your past, this is different. This is you disobeying me." He caught his eyes, forcing submission this time, "You know that is different, we've had very frank conversations regarding your obedience." He kept walking.

They were outside of his house now, and Ben was grabbing at his arm, "Hurley, please-"

"Enough Ben, I gave you more than enough chances."

"Please, you can't send me away, Hurley, please."

He cringed at the desperation in Ben's voice, but resolved against it. Ben would never be happy on the island while he still held all that in, so he would make a decision for his own good and send him somewhere he could start over. "Pack your bags. You'll leave tomorrow."

"I'm sorry, I'll make the list, please." Hurley kept walking but was held up when Ben grabbed his arm, slipping to his knees, begging. "Please, I'm sorry, I'll do whatever you say, please don't send me away Hurley, please. This is my home."

There were people watching, though they tried to hide it. Pointing, laughing as Ben begged on his knees. Hurley reached down to grab his arm, "Come on, get up Ben." The people already had very little respect for him, they didn't need to see him on the ground begging, "Will you make the list?"

He was already nodding, oblivious to the show he was putting on as Hurley pulled him to his feet. "Anything you want, anything I can do."

The saddest part of that was Hurley believed him. He didn't think so before, but Ben couldn't leave the island, he could see it in his eyes. "I just want you to make the list Ben, and I swear to you that nothing you write down will make me send you away. Do you understand?"

"I do." He glanced around, realizing he had made a spectacle of himself, and self consciously brushed his clothes off. "Why are you doing this to me?"

He chucked him under the chin, ignoring the glare he got, "Doing this FOR you Ben, not to you."

If he had something to say to that he kept his mouth shut, obviously shaken by almost being sent off the island. Hurley walked away, silently pleading with Ben to take him seriously and do what he was asking. He was almost to the end of the sidewalk when Ben called out to him. He turned back around, "Yes?"

Ben looked pale, like he was going to be sick, "Give me your word that you will not send me away."

He didn't have to fake a smile, "Nothing you put will make me send you away Ben, I give you my word."

* * *

No one had seen Ben for at least two days, from what Hurley had gathered he hadn't even been in for meals. He was sitting in his office when there was a soft knock on the door.

"Come in."

Ben looked worse for wear, quietly shutting the door behind him. He edged to the desk, his eyes on the floor. He was holding a few pieces of paper in his hands, hopelessly mangling them. He finally glanced up and Hurley could see that he had been crying. Facing all the bad things he had done was sure to be hard for Ben, but that was part of it too.

He put a hand out for it and Ben handed the papers over without a word, eyes troubled. Hurley glanced through the papers, eyebrows going up even though he already knew it all. Seeing it written down was different. It wasn't until he was reading through it that he realized he had done more than force Ben to face the things he had done, there were a fair amount of things that must have humiliated Ben to acknowledge.

"I'll leave you to read it all."

"Stay."

Ben nodded, eyes back to the ground. He only glanced through it for a few more minutes before pushing it aside. "How do you feel?"

"You didn't read it all."

"I don't need to."

The first flash of real life showed in his eyes and he snarled out, "Why did you have me write it if you weren't even going to bother to read it?"

He had to catch himself before answering, reminding himself that he couldn't ever allow Ben control of a conversation. He pointed at the chair and waited until Ben grudgingly sat down before asking again, "How do you feel?"

He could see Ben physically biting back his anger, and after a moment he managed to get out, "Like I have my whole life out on display for someone who can't even be bothered to look at it." His voice broke, "Don't you even care?"

Hurley sighed, he didn't like the hurt in Ben's voice. He raised an eyebrow, "I'm not him." Ben made a small sound that Hurley ignored for his sake and stood up to walk in front of the desk, leaning back against it. "I don't need to read it Ben, the minute I took control of this island I already knew everything that had been done on it, everything that you had done. In the name of Jacob and in the search of power."

Ben looked confused and glanced toward the paper, "I don't… then why would you make me write it out like that?"

"You would never have believed that I really knew everything, you would have always thought you had to hide things from me, and you don't. I don't hold a single thing in there against you. Do you understand?"

"Yes." He resented being spoken to like a child, obviously, but Hurley hoped that once it sunk in he would realize he didn't have to carry all those things on his shoulders.

"Also, you needed to face those things. You needed to acknowledge the things you have done wrong. How did it feel writing them all down?"

Ben's jaw was set, eyes back on the ground, "Horrible."

"Good, it should. But you need to understand it's the past, I'm not holding it against you Ben. You need to stop holding it against yourself too." He reached out to set one hand on his shoulder, "Are you okay?"

He nodded, but wouldn't look up, "I don't like being treated like a child."

Hugo only smiled, "You know how much I respect you Ben, just giving you a helping hand. Even you need it once in a while." He didn't 'snoop' in Ben's thoughts often but he couldn't help but notice the small flair of hope. That is what he wanted, wanted Ben to have hope.

Several quiet minutes passed but eventually Ben looked up, "It isn't just you that I need forgiveness from."

He was already making progress and Hugo patted his shoulder and headed to the door, "Whatever you need to do Ben, I'll be here to help you. Lunch?"

He finally tilted his head in acceptance, "Lead the way." There was more meaning in the words than simply heading for a meal, but for once Ben was content to follow.


End file.
